Phineas and Ferb Make a Motion Picture
by AsSRape69
Summary: Title says it all. A classic Phineas and Ferb tale, suited for the average audience.


Phineas and Ferb Make a Motion Picture

We open on our heroes sitting underneath their usual tree pondering over how to spend their day.

"Gee Ferb, I can't seem to come up with an idea. With all the crazy stuff that's happened this summer, I don't know if there's anything left for us to do." Said Phineas.

Parry let out a soft platypus growl.

"Hey, Parry! Do you have any ideas on what to do today?"

Phineas is answered with another growl.

"Hmmm, I don't know why I thought that would work…"

"Hey Phineas, whatcha dooooin?" Asked Isabella, who was joined with Baljeet, Beaufort and a troupe of fireside girls.

"Actually Isabella we're not sure yet, you see—"

"PHINEAS!" Yelled Candace as she approached the group of kids.

"Candace?" Asked Phineas.

"Phineas, I don't know what kind of bustable things you have planned for today but—"

"Actually Candace, Ferb and I don't have any plans for today."

"What? Really?… well alright let's keep it that way! Cause I have a date with Jeremy tonight, and I'd prefer if it went uninterrupted."

"You don't have to worry about us Candace. Hey! Where's Parry?"

Parry took the opportunity when Candace came in to slink behind the tree. He put on his fedora and the tree flipped him into its secret trunk-slide compartment.

_PAAA-RRYYY! _A chorus sang, followed by a track, (_doo-bee doo-bee doo ba!_)

As Parry fell into his seat Major Monogram began his speech.

"Good morning Agent P! As I'm sure you've already guessed, Doofenschmirtz is up to no good. Go to his lab and see what kind of evil scheme he's cooked up this time. And be careful Agent P, with the end of the summer coming up SOME of us have gotten a little lazy -ahem- _Carl_,"

"Heyyy sir!" Said an offscreen whiny, possibly Jewish, teenage voice.

"In any case we haven't been watching him that closely so he could be up to anything. Stay alert. Monogram out." And with that Parry dashed off to fight the forces of evil. (PAA-RRY!)

"Sir," said Carl, "You do know it was your turn to keep an eye on Doofenschmirtz, right?"

"Pipe down Carl! I… I'm sorry. I've been having a rough week."

"Oh boy sir, should I make a pot of tea?"

"Earl grey please, with lemon." Said Monogram, getting emotional. "And can we watch The Princess Bride?"

"Of course sir."

We come back to our heroes, with Candace having left to go on her date with Jeremy.

"So what're ya gonna do without any ideas, Phineas?" Asked Beaufort.

"I guess we'll just have to wait until the idea comes to us." Said Phineas.

"What on Earth is that horrifying noise?" Asked Baljeet as he looked toward the house.

"Sounds like adventure is afoot! Let's check it out!" Said Beaufort.

As the group approached the house to investigate the noise, it gradually became more audible.

"It sounds like someone's grunting." Isabella pointed out.

"There is indeed something primal about it." Said a timid Baljeet.

The group looked through the window to see Phineas and Ferb's milf of a mom getting pounded by their dad.

"Oh god honey, that twat is tight!"

"Oh yes! Pound me good! "

They continued to watch in horror and amazement as Mrs. Flynn got a fat nut busted onto her bimbo face.

"That's it!" Exclaimed Phineas, "Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today!"

"Take turns fuckin your mom?" Asked Beaufort, boner in hand.

"No, we're gonna make a porno!"

Isabella immediately fainted.

"So does this mean I can keep my ding-dong out?"

_Doofenschmirtz Evil In-COR-porated!_

Parry arrived by jetpack on the scene, bursting through the wall of the Doof building. Some jazz chords play as Heinz exclaims, "Parry the Platypus!? A-HA!" And with that Doof sprung a trap. Dildoes rained down and trapped Parry the Platypus by forming a cadge around him.

"Looks like you're about to be doing some _hard time _Parry the Platypus. Aha ha ha… but seriously the reason I have those is actually related to my inator, I'm not some kind of weirdo."

Parry just looked at him.

"What? You don't believe me? Ah whatever, you know what? I don't need that kind of judgement from YOU, Parry the Platypus even if I did have those just for me. Anyway, BEHOLD! My Faggot-inator! With this I will be able to transform the entire tristate area into a city of perverted gays that will be so sex crazed they will take to humping in the streets! With all of the sex going on they will be vulnerable to take over. Just like the fall of Rome! Or so that's what I've heard, I've never actually, you know, researched it I just kinda took some people's word for it that that's what caused Rome to fall. Anyway, if that idea craps out I will sell my patented brand Doofenschmitrz dildoes and become the richest man in the tristate area!"

Parry struggles to break free from the cell.

"Don't even bother Parry the Platypus, the Doofenschmortz patented dildoes are made from reinforced silicon, which not only makes them the perfect substance to trap my nemesis, but also allows them to be cleaned of bodily fluids easily!"

"I like to use them as stocking stuffers!" Said Norm.

"Would you be quiet? Sheesh."

Heinz engages in a flashback.

"You see Parry the Platypus, when I was a boy growing up in Druselschtein I was very fond of this gay couple that lived across the street from me. But my mother never let me over to see them because she said they were perverts. It was an older time. Anyway, one day the couple gave me a puppy. It was so cute and tiny and I thought we would be best friends forever, but since it was from the gays my mother forced me to put it up for adoption."

End flashback

"But now, I will be able to turn the whole city into a steamy, gay sexcapade and never have to worry about anyone being discriminated against sexually ever again! Which isn't really so evil now that I think about it, but whatever. I'll take over the tristate area, blah blah blah you get the idea."

We come back to our heroes having set up a large pornography studio in their backyard with beds, lights and dozens of porn stars. A man walked up to Phineas and said,

"Aren't you a little young to be running a pornography studio?"

"Why yes, yes we are." He said as he signed for some obscure bullshit.

"Hey Phineas, how are we gonna do this if we're not 18?" Asked Baljeet.

"Good question Baljeet! Ferb and I made these legally 18 clones of ourselves so that we can transfer our consciousness into them and take part in the movie."

"Well what are we waiting for?" Asked Beaufort, "Let's hump some hookers!"

So the weird technically legal sex scene started happening and Isabella was gettin real horny and shit. Beaufort was using his ape like strength and girthy meat rocket to fuck whatever was moving. Man, woman, squirrel, bird, ducky-momo. It didn't matter to him. Ferb just layed down and let the hoes come to him since his penis was biggest. Various foods were incorporated into the fucking. Cucumbers and spaghetti were in the midst of the fornication.

"You will give me your seed Phineas!" Screeched Isabella, foaming at the mouth as she pinned him down and "raped" him. Cuz men can't be raped in case you didn't know. Baljeet was really into piss play, like really into it. He got some skanks to piss into his curry scented mouth and then peg him. There was a pungent scent of turds and smegma erupting from the scene.

"Now Parry the Platypus! I will fire the first shot of my inator into the unsuspecting citizens of the TRI-STATE-AREA!"

But Parry quickly escaped the cadge and kicked the Doof into the machine, cause the machines to start randomly firing into the city.

"Oh Jeremy," Said Candace, "This has been the best date of my life."

"Me too," Said Jeremy and the two leaned in for a kiss. Suddenly a beam blasted Jeremy.

"On second thought," He said stopping the kiss "I'm into that peen now, sorry gurl." He then stopped some random guy on the street and started sucking his D.

"PHINEAS! FERB!" Yelled Candace. She got into the car and drove off to get her mom.

As the fight raged on between Parry and Doofenschmirtz more and more people were gayified and the town slowly started fucking itself. But in a faggy way of course. As Doof is knocked over a dildo is flung into his face.

"Ow! You know this is really rough, I should really do some product testing before—"

He is interrupted by another kick by Parry shifting the Inator into asexual loli mode. A beam goes off into the open.

"MOM!" Yelled Candace as she pulls her mom off of her dads dick.

"Candace!"

"Mom you gotta come see what Phineas and Ferb did. They're doing weird sex things in the back yard. Look! You gotta see!"

As Candace runs into the back yard the asexual loli beam gets fired into the yard. The children turn back into their normal young selves and stop fucking each other. All the beds and dildoes and shit get taken away by all the sex crazed individuals of the city.

"Look!" Says Candace as she proudly presents a normal looking back yard.

"Wow Candace," said Mrs. Flynn who was totally nakes, "You're fuckin bat shit crazy."

"Bu-bu-bu-bu" Repeated the defeated sister.

"I'm gonna go back to fuckin your dad."

Back at Doofenschmirtz lab Parry switches the inator to normal mode and blasts a wave that spreads over the city. He kicks Heinz in the face and then shoves a dildo up his ass and then flings another into the body of the inator, causing it to explode.

"Curse you Parry the Platypus!" Yells Heinz as Parry flies away.

"Wow sir, you look like you really got your stocking stuffed!"

"Shut up, Norm!

Back to the boys' backyard ;) Jeremy comes to console Candace.

"Jeremy!"

"Candace!" The two embraced. "Candace I don't know what came over me back there, do you think you can ever forgive me?"

"Of course Jeremy, I could never stay mad at you."

The two kissed and Candace got some jizz in her mouth. With a look of disgust she pulled out a long strand of it.

"You two might want to get checked." Said Ferb and the whole group laughed.

A fedora-less Parry comes on the scene. "Oh, there you are Parry!" Said Phineas who was met by another growl from Parry.

A chord plays.

THE END


End file.
